Round One

Back in chilly Recovery room. What happened ? I was taken to the operating room, signed the consent forms. Gowned up and laid on what looks a little  like a dentists  chair , but lower . The local injection was put inside my mouth, beneath the tumour and, I can't lie, it stings. Toe curling but I hang  on to my breathing and remember it is only a moment in time, soon to be gone.

I have a deal with Mr Hussain, Mr Mohes, not to cry. I'm sticking to it as best I can but the body has its own ideas and big , fat salty drops escape, unbidden ,down the side of my face. A reverberation begins in my stomach which will give me no peace but as we English do, I try to squash it. By thinking of the washing on the line and how much there is to do.

What I notice is how very important small acts of human kindness are when we are this vulnerable. Someone holding my hand, another gently drumming his fingers on my forehead to distract me from the discomfort as the anaesthetic goes in, a word of encouragement about how I'm doing by Mr Hussain. Who is now the equivalent of God to me today.All I want to do is please him.

I do not witness the removal of my facial flesh , the area of which has already been marked out in pen , as , with my permission my head is wrapped and my eyes are covered,it's a relief. A lot of pushing and pressing but no pain. Followed by the disconcerting smell of burning flesh as the veins are cauterised. What  I'm left with is a very fat and distorted lip, covered by a large pressure bandage,, I shuffle back to the Recovery a Room,gently aided by one of the nurses, and Graham is here,,waiting. Thank goodness.

A kind lady with a pressure pad beneath her nose looks on sympathetically and makes me a cup of tea. To be drunk, cool,,with a straw.

I'm ready for bed but I have a nasty feeling that this is just the first shot over the bow .Never mind , there's weeks worth of ancient 'Hellos"'. Who'd have thought that the Kate Middleton girl was still seeing Prince William,?  Wouldn't it be exciting if they got married?!!