Days 16, 18 and 19

Not a lot of blogging this week but I have taken photographs of the scar as the week has unfolded. Which might help. Every single day there is a change.

Tuesday ( Day 16)

Thursday ( Day 18 )

This was the morning that I went into town - Leeds - on my own which, considering I have been out and about, was a big deal. I dithered around for ages , particularly about the need to add the steri strip to my lip. As you know, in my heart I don't feel it was truly necessary but it signalled me as someone recovering from an op , rather than ... What, someone with a ' permanent problem '? I need to reflect on that, don't I ?

Anyway, I made an effort ( photo included ) , I even  Instgrammed, and set off.  What I discovered was that, with friends and family I am comfortable having modified the way I speak and my facial expressions. I have needed to restrict movement so as not to create tension on my face, presumably because it pulls on the underlying scars. I hadn't appreciated just how animated I must normally be in my non verbal communication though because, when speaking to people in shops, I felt somehow frozen. Clear ? As mud ?? All I'm saying is that, perhaps if you didn't know me , you wouldn't notice, but I was aware that I wasn't firing on all my communication cylinders !! Oh, and I guess that the snail trail of Vaseline down my nose to my lip might have been an indicator too ...

After about an hour or so I was tired. Of town. Of the shops. Me ? Unheard of  ! There must be more going on than I'd appreciated and I'm going to ask Dr H later this morning what exactly has happened to my face. Where the stitches are, why it's still so tiring.


Friday ( Day 19 )

In the words of a Friend's Husband " Katherine, really, it's not so bad ... " . Now if that was a girlfriend one would be seething, counting the ways in which you never really liked them anyway, but , from a MAN, that is praise indeed.

As to how my face feels. It feels tight on the right side. I still can't smile properly without it pulling so applying blusher is sheer hell ! Joke ! I just have to turn up the corners of my mouth but the plus side is of course that there's no need for Botox, yet ! Actually, nothing has been funny enough to warrant a laugh since early August. Crying is a no too. The only way to do it is to turn one's mouth into a most unattractive letterbox shape which means only strangulated yips can escape . One glimpse of yourself looking and sounding like that is enough to make you desist . Oh yes, I've become quite the pragmatist as far as expressing myself is concerned.

Finally, bruising. Mostly gone, certainly the discolouration , although my cheek bone is still very pronounced. My lips are almost back to normal as the photos show with a little bruising . Nothing that Mac can't disguise .